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Self Doubt vs. Self Worth



This is a battle I have with myself daily.

There are days when I want to give up and throw the towel in and then there are days when I am motivated to the infinity power and nothing is going to stop me from achieving my dreams.


It's a mean battle. It's an inner fight I have with myself all the time. I find myself going back and forth between these two extremes all the time.

Last night, I wanted to literally punch myself in the face.

I let my self doubt win and my very own word vomit errupted before it's very eyes and exploded all into these wedding professional's faces.

I said things like:

"Yeah, I'm new. I've only been doing it a year..."

"This whole wedding industry is a little intimidating."

"Yeah, there are so many photographers and aspiring photographers, it gets a little discouraging."

"I don't have much equipment yet."

"I'm not really that good."

SERIOUSLY SHALYN!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!

How the heck am I supposed to be successful if I say things like this about myself? OUTLOUD at that?

SHAME on me.

Yes, I may be new to pursuing this dream of mine, but who cares if I've only been doing "professional" photography a year. YOU have to start somewhere right???

Yes, the wedding industry IS intimidating. However, so is this thing we call life. Every dream we have is intimidating, but if what happens when we don't dare to dream, and try to accomplish those dreams?


If you don't strive to accomplish your dreams, then your dreams will always be dreams until you decide to make them a reality. And y'all...I'm deciding right now that I'm going to make my dreams a reality.

I often hear from other wedding professionals at events I do and I hear, "Oh, you're a photographer...Yeah, there ARE so many really have to learn to set yourself apart." I
even get the occasional, "Good luck!" and one time, a lady said, "Girl, you're going to have to be awesome in order for anyone to recognize your work. You have stiff competition in this city."

You know what I have to say to that?

Watch me.

Sure, I have 240820423957 things to learn. The good news? I LOVE to learn. Learning=Experience. Experience=Professional. I will get there.

I'm tired of comparing myself to others and thinking I'm not good enough...yet.

I'm so tired of letting people make me feel that I'm not good enough to be successful at this.

I'm so done with letting my own self doubt defeat my self worth.

I will develop confidence. I will be PROUD of my work.

I may not be perfect & I may not know what the heck I'm doing...but what I do know is that I LOVE photography. I absolutely love it. It's a passion unlike anything else I have.

I have drive. I have will.

I have to learn to listen to the good things my friends & family have to say about my work and not focus on the negative. There will always be vultures who only want to see you fail. I WILL NOT FAIL. THEY WILL NOT KNOCK ME DOWN. It's simply not an option anymore.

And if Austin isn't going to welcome me with open arms?

Then I will open my arms and wait for them to come to me.

I AM good enough. I am. & SO ARE YOU.

So I challenge you...

DO what you LOVE & LOVE what you DO.

Don't ever let anyone,including yourself get you down.

Win your battle.

Because you're the only person that can make it happen.


post circle 27 comments :

  1. I LOVE LOVE LOVE this post! I want you to know... I think your photos are gorgeous, and I know that brides are going to see that! And then when they meet you, they'll fall even more for you. :) Keep your head up girlie!!

  2. AMEN!...With a standing "O" and a cherry on top! (Huh?) ;)

    Apparently, you and I fight the same monster...and we are not alone.

    God just used a really good way. (Is there any other?) Thanks, chica!

  3. Wow, you basically just said so many of the things I've been thinking/struggling with. I've been having such an inner battle about either following my true DREAMS or settling for something. I know I'll regret settling but then I always start to doubt whether I'm enough; whether I'm good enough, smart enough, experienced enough, etc.

    But, you're right. We all have to start somewhere. Either that, or we end up not starting at all. This was so beautifully worded and definitely something I needed to read. I've been needing that little nudge :) From what I've seen, your photography is beautiful. You have natural talent and the desire to always be learning more. Continue doing what you love! You're an inspiration to us all :)

    I loved this girl. LOVED.
    and i love you.
    Austin will love you. (the city, not my boyfriend. that probably wouldnt be good. for either DDHP or me)

    anyways, SO excited to watch you as you grow as a photographer and develop your talent even more!!!

  5. The beauty of Photo is that you will always be learning! It's not something you learn all in one day, every time you shoot you learn! :)

  6. Yes thank you for this! This is exactly what I needed to hear! I've been struggling SO much in school and literally, i'm on the verge of giving up. But reading this made me say..."Raquel, you're not the girl who gives up so easy. You're strong, you're studious, and you can do anything you set your mind and heart to! So get to work!"

  7. "win your battle, because you're the only person that can make it happen" You ARE good enough! Plus everyone has a different style of what they do, so don't compare your flaws to their strengths!

    I think one of my biggest flaws is I am SO hard on myself. My parents say that I have always been like that. because when I fall short of the best, I beat myself up about it. But it is SO unhealthy. This past year I have really been trying to be more light hearted and I can def see improvement.

    Put a little saying or two one your mirror in your bathroom like " You are enough" or "I am proud to be me!" Sounds SOOOOO cheesy, but its a good little reminder :)

    Thanks for this post! Need to hear this.

  8. i just love you...and this...and you

    you are awesome and you are doing big things

    you ARE good enough and I am so glad you know this about yourself!

    sure its okay to question things (i always do it!!) but in the end, if you know you love it, its REAL!

    if that makes sense!

    you are so amazing shay and i loved this...dont let anyone get you down girlfrand :-) because you are way better than them MUAH


  9. You go girl!!! And your pictures are amazing...keep believing in your abilities and soaking it all in. :)

  10. Girlfrand...YOU are an AMAZING photographer and an EVEN MORE AMAZING person!! Stop being so hard on yourself!! You can totally do this.

    Beaubeau and I will be your biggest fans!!!

  11. Just stumbled across your blog, and I'm so happy I did. This is such a wonderful and inspiring post! I fight a similar battle everyday too. But, we're strong women, we can do it!

  12. AMEN!!! This is SO TRUE.

    And excuse me, but you are an AMAZING photographer. Stop doubting yourself!

  13. thumbs wayyyyy up to this post! shalyn, with a positive attitude like this NO one can stop a determined woman! I'm sure will go far with skills like yours and remember practice makes perrrfect! You go girl :)

  14. You are so positive and on fire for your dreams! That is the key to success!! :) You're awesome! Go big girl!

  15. I found you through Raven's Christmas blog swap comments. I'm so excited to be following now!

  16. This is such an amazing post. We could all use a reminder that we are good enough and shouldn't give up on our dreams!

  17. This post is amazing on so many levels. We have to learn to not compare ourselves to others and realize that we are good enough and that there are people that love us just how we are. If we believe in what we are doing, we can do it.

  18. Print this up!! Carry it with you!! Anytime that self doubt creeps in -- go to the bathroom or somewhere private and read it til ya believe it:)
    I think your photos are amazing!

  19. Very inspiring! I love it. There are things I want to do, but it's like I don't allow myself. Maybe now I'll give myself a little push.

  20. LOVE this Shalyn, just love. I have SO been there, that self-doubt where I saw those same things about me, OUT LOUD like you, and it's just human nature I think BUT LIKE YOU SAID, if we want to grow and get better, we can't let ourselves do that, we have to believe in ourselves first or no one else will. Cliche? Yes but SO TRUE.

    just love this. I have no doubt you are going to be a superstar photographer where you will have to TURN DOWN prospective clients because you are just too busy and booked up! Oh yes, that will happen ;)

  21. I am a new follower - I found your blog thanks to Tara (Fabulous But Evil) ... and I am so glad I did! This post is genius, refreshing & comforting! I love this and am so eager to read more of your blog!

  22. such a great reminder girl!!!!!

    I think you are amazing, AMAZING! F Y I!


  23. This is absolutely beautiful, Shalyn!! I find myself doing the same thing sometimes...saying "I haven't been a nurse that long." Or even a wife. Let's just be proud of who we are NOW...and who we are working to become!!

  24. as they say, we are our biggest critics and it really shouldn't be that way. we should be our biggest cheerleaders!

    you can do any and everything you put your mind to. you will do it bigger and better than the rest as long as you believe it!

    loved this post! :)

  25. I know it must be hard to feel confident in what you are doing because there are so many photographers out there but you are SO DIFFERENT, Shay! It is amazing how good you are, especially since you are so new! Just look at all you have accomplished, my friend! There is no doubt in my mind you have what it takes. If I lived closer you would definitely be taking my maternity pics! Love you girl!

  26. I love this post. I want to print it out and stick it on my wall. :)

  27. I remember when you posted this, but for some reason I didn't comment. Over the past day or so, I've been reading your entire blog (hope you don't think that's creepy). You are just an inspiration. I'm beginning to start my photography business. I have self doubt all the time and not believing in myself. My hubby is super supportive. It makes him sad seeing me being the only one not believing in me and my work. I just hate when people are like, "oh you're a photographer?" or "what are you really going to do for a job" or "good luck with that." It really gets me down. I don't think I am a photographer just because I own a DSLR. I AM one. I am afraid to put myself out there on Facebook and my blog, because I'm really afraid of what people will say. I don't want people to think I'm just a girl trying to be a photographer. It's my passion and what I want to do.This is a perfect post. Definitely one to come back to on a day when feeling low to give a confidence boost.